“I Saw Two Lines”..again
Did you know that all at home pregnancy tests were created equal! YUP, so much so that I used and found the ASSURED dollar store brand to be the best! Month after month, I would take the test if my period was even a day late. Me and Flo* had a thang going on- she was the varsity cheerleader, the Captain, the ACE - rooting me on from the sidelines. She was the best, besides she didn’t talk, produced the timeline month after month with no help from myself and encouraged the madness with “your cycle is #of days late”!
I remember the very first time I peed on the stick, with my husband awaiting so calm but with the vibe of excitement and a determined glee for two little feet to run and jump in our bed! Awkward enough, reading the directions and attempting to pee in a paper cup while holding the stick for dear life! After this excitement being met with the nonsense of hCG and fetal pole terms- I could see the subsequent pees on the stick were enthralled with my husbands desire to protect, to shield me from the pain and to be the rock that was required for me not to give up!
Well how do you mend after seeing the two lines and the Doctor telling you that your pregnancy will not go to term; specifically that you have lost or that you are threatened with loss of your pregnancy. Did you know that the actions steps following this will ultimately determine the success of your next pregnancy? Trust me Queen, these five tips changed my perspective and afforded me the opportunity to mourn each of my losses as well as to reconnect to reality.
Here are a few tips/tricks to begin your journey of healing:
Understand that it's not your fault. Pregnancy loss or complications can strike anyone!
Give yourself time to heal!
Take time off from work!
Don't expect your partner to grieve in the same way!
Don't close yourself off from others!
To my Mom, Mom 2 Be and Mom In Waiting, pregnancy is often filled with emotional ups and downs. It's normal to get your hopes up at the first sign of a positive pregnancy test. Discovering complications along the way can be devastating BUT you can educate yourself to make informed decisions and to “retrain your brain” to think positively about the next pee on the stick. Remember, no two pregnancies are the same!
*Flo is a women’s health app, available on iOS and Android, that supports women at each stage of their reproductive cycle.
